Confidence Doesn’t Come Before Action - It Comes Because of It

Confidence.

Everyone says you need it. But no one tells you how to actually get it.

At impowr, we’ve worked with hundreds of high-achieving women. And here’s what we’ve seen again and again:

The most confident women aren't always the most experienced, the most qualified, or even the most extroverted. They're the ones who have practiced showing up before they ready. Confidence wasn't a prerequisite. It was the result.

Why Confidence Feels So Elusive for Women

Let’s talk facts.

Over 75% of executive women report having experienced imposter syndrome in their careers, according to a study by KPMG.
Women are less likely to apply for jobs unless they meet 100% of the listed qualifications (compared to 60% for men), according to a Hewlett-Packard internal report.
Confidence in men and women starts equally, but men’s confidence tends to increase with experience, while women’s often stalls or dips, especially in male-dominated industries (Zenger Folkman).

Why? Because the traditional model is backwards. We’ve been told we need to feel confident first. Then we act. But it’s the doing that actually builds the belief.

The Confidence–Action Loop (How It Really Works)

The science is clear: confidence grows with action.

Psychologist Albert Bandura’s theory of self-efficacy says that the most effective way to build belief in your ability is through mastery experiences- not thinking about doing, not talking about doing, but actually doing.

When you take action, even if it’s small, you send a message to your brain:

“I’m capable. I can figure this out. I can trust myself.”

That builds self-trust. And self-trust is the real foundation of confidence. Eventually, you build a wealth of evidence that tells your brain "seeee, I can do this", and you start telling yourself "I've done this before, I can do it again, and every time, I get better."

The Cost of Waiting to “Feel Ready”

When women wait for confidence before they act, it costs them:

Opportunities passed up (because you “weren’t ready”)
Ideas unshared (because you were scared of being wrong)
Silence in meetings, pitches, and negotiations (because you didn’t feel “expert” enough)

In short: You shrink. Even when you’re ready to expand. And in workplaces? That silence impacts everything from visibility to promotion, from innovation to culture.

“But I’m Scared I’ll Mess It Up…”

Yes. That’s part of it. Taking action doesn’t mean eliminating fear. It means choosing to move with it. In fact, the presence of fear is often the signal that you’re on the edge of something powerful.

Instead of waiting to feel confident, what if you simply practiced being courageous for 30 seconds at a time?

Raise your hand.
Speak the idea.
Submit the application.
Record the video.
Say the truth.

Confidence comes from those moments - not from pep talks or perfection. And "messing up" is part of the process of building confidence. None of us magically starting walking as babies, we tried standing again and again, and fell again and again. Success via trial and error is wired into our evolution, and it's no different when it comes to work.

5 Tangible Actions to Build Confidence Now

If you're ready to shift into practice, try this:

The 30-Second Courage Rule→ Choose one thing you’ve been putting off. Set a timer. Do it for 30 seconds. That’s often all it takes.
Confidence Reps Tracker→ Each time you do something that stretches you, even slightly, track it. Build your own bank of proof.
“If I trusted myself…” Prompt→ Ask yourself this daily: If I trusted myself fully, what would I do next?
Flip the Failure→ Redefine “mistakes” as lessons. After any setback, journal: “What did I try?” “What did I learn?” “How was this growth?”
Do Before You Feel Ready→ Send the email. Post the idea. Offer the help. Apply anyway. The confidence will catch up. Taking a big deep breath and counting to 3 actually helps!

Reframing the Narrative

Let’s be clear:

Confidence isn’t loud. It’s not about being extroverted. It doesn’t mean never doubting yourself. Real confidence is quiet self-trust. It’s you, backing you, even when the outcome isn’t guaranteed.

And that kind of confidence? It’s available to you. But it’s earned through action.

Build a Growth Mindset, Build Your Resilience

The biggest shift we teach at impowr is this:

Confidence = Self-trust + Reps + Resilience

And at the root of that equation is a growth mindset. According to Dr. Carol Dweck, a growth mindset means believing your abilities aren’t fixed- they can grow with effort, feedback, and practice. When you adopt this mindset, failure becomes feedback. And action becomes the path.

Not sure where to start? Ask yourself: “What would I do this week if I knew I didn’t need to get it perfect… only get it started?”